Friday, October 15, 2010

I am not complaining

I am so blessed that I, at 64 years of age still have my mother with me. Up until this year she has been very alert. We are witnessing a very steady decline in her awareness in the past five to six months. Confusion is almost every day now.
What I wanted to write about though, is that I am officially one of the Sandwich Generation. It was not so evident as it was today. The Sandwich Generation are those who care for their elderly parents as well as their grandchildren or children. Squeezed between two groups of people who need you 24/7. Fortunately, I do not have to spend 24/7 with our mother. There are others who care for her too.
Today, though, I did feel very alone in the job. There was no one to spell me for the afternoon when I needed to be 25 miles from her home to pick up a granddaughter from school. Even though it is only 25 miles, it is nearly an one hour drive since it is not freeway driving. Olivia gets home from school at 3:55 and I usually pick her up at the bus stop.
At 2:30 I finally had mother and Darius in the car for the trip north to Arlington. We arrived at my home at 3:30 so I could unlock the door for another grandchild to come in after school. She wanted to wait at my home until time for the high school football game. My home is just four blocks from the high school. Unlocked the door, picked up Olivia at 3:55, started back down the highway to mother's home, stopped at the bank for money for her, stopped for gas, fielded a call from Olivia's mother because she was off work and wondered where I was. Made it to mother's home at 5:00, got her settled back into her chair, told my brother all that happened to her today, turned around drove back home. Arrived home at 6:15, Angie picked up Olivia, Bryan picked up Darius and I collapsed on the couch where I still am. 100 miles of running back and forth and I am exhausted!!


Becky said...

Hello ~ Just wanted you to know that you, your mother, and your family are in my prayers. I also know very well what it is like to be caring for not only your mother, but you own family as well. I am glad that you have other family members to help you out. ~ Take care and God Bless.

Anonymous said...

Its a very hard fact that so many responsabilities fall so heavily on so few shoulders, Im so glad you have others to share your careing, and hold you all in prayer.
God Bless Granma!!

Frizzy and Bird said...

Evy, I wish I were there to help you out. I recall you saying she drinks plenty of fluid. Is she on any type of medicine that takes fluid off her body? Does she sleep well? Not getting enough sleep can cause confusion so can depression. I hope my input isn't more frustrating. I only want to share what I've learned that could help. I hate to hear how tired you are. Hugs and prayers across the miles.

Tatersmama said...

It's no wonder that you're exhausted! That schedule would take it out of anyone, and when you add to it all the caring and worrying you do, I'm surprised that you even found the energy to type!
You ARE managing to find some "me time" aren't you? If not, you need to start thinking about it, because you're important to a lot of people... and they need you healthy, well-rested and sane, you know. ;)

gayle said...

I don't know how you are doing it all!! Take care of you too!!

Anonymous said...

I know the feeling very well...praying for you, my friend!

Roslyn said...

God bless you Evy, it's not an easy road for the sandwich generation. So sorry that your Mom is having problems. No matter how long we have them it isn't long enough & I do believe that it's harder when the mind goes first.


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