Monday, May 18, 2009

WHY?


I was the first person to hold and kiss her. She and her 17 year old mommy lived with me for 8 months. I wanted to adopt her, her mommy chose to keep her. I loved her as deeply as I loved a child I gave birth to. I fed her and changed her, I held her while she slept. I bathed her and smelled her sweet baby perfume. Eventually she and her mommy, her grandma and aunties and uncle, who had all been staying with us moved to their own apartment. Her mommy signed up on welfare. After a month or so on welfare, DSHS (the same evil entity that is now screwing up Poca's life) made the decision that her mommy was "mature" enough to live on her own in her own apartment. Her grandma argued and argued with DSHS that her mommy was NOT mature enough. She knew her daughter they had only known her for a month. Her grandma told DSHS that if they moved them to their own apartment she could guarentee that her daughter would be dead within a year. They, who knew more than the mother, moved them anyway.

Her mommy loved living away from grandma. There were no rules and no structure. She did not get fed regularly, she was kept out at all hours of the day and night. Grandma tried to help, but her mommy did not want her help.

One week in February of 1993 her grandma called to check on them. There was no answer, she called every night for five nights. On the last night she called she left a final message saying that if she did not call back tonight she (grandma) was going to call the police because something must be wrong.

About an hour later her uncle received a call from his friends that in essence told the family that she and her mommy had been found MURDERED in their apartment along with mommy's boyfriend. Mommy and the boyfriend had been tied up in bed, forced to lie on their stomachs and shot in the back of the head. She died of starvation and freezing. She was left in the apartment by the person who murdered her mommy. He thought someone would find her. Her bedroom window was broken and this 10 month old baby girl lay in her bed until death overtook her.

Why, you ask, do I hate DSHS? This is why. Alecia, my baby, would be 16 years old this month. She never got to ride a tricycle, a bike, go to a prom, learn to drive. She never got to discover sand between her toes, Disneyland, ice cream cones or reading a book.

Can we really allow the same fate to befall Poca?

18 comments:

Homestay Mama said...

Oh, Evy. This is so awful--so sad. I can see why you will never get over Alecia's death!

Greywolfe said...

God is real and so is the Devil. There is an evil that has permiated our government and we have allowed it. We have allowed for government to come into every aspect of our lives and determine for us what is right and wrong.

Your baby girl died because we as Americans failed to protect her FROM the government.

God love you and give you his peace. God bless the memories you have for that baby. Remember that even though she left this world in a bad way, she was instantly cradled in the arms of a magnificent Savior. More love and care can not be had.

Greywolfe said...

And by the way, if you ever want to get ahold of me, my email is greywolfe226@gmail.com. I check it regularly and often.

FalkFamily said...

I'm so sorry - things like this just seem so unjust. We cannot allow this to happen again to any child! Love you!

Julie said...

I am so sorry!!!!!

Therese said...

This is so sad, Evy! I am so sorry for them and for you!

Gina said...

Actually, mom, she wasn't even 18 yet. That's why DSHS interveined. Otherwise they would have had no say in where she lived. She was babrely 16 when Alecia was born.
But greywolf is absolutely spot on. We will see Alecia again.

Pautlitz Blog said...

All I can say is WOW. THere are no words. These people think they are GOD. Who are they to decide peoples fate.

Pautlitz Blog said...

All I can say is WOW. THere are no words. These people think they are GOD. Who are they to decide peoples fate.

Annette Rosebrook said...

I remember this well, I went to school w/this girl. We weren’t close and we had no idea that we were connected through our families. I know that this girl like many others felt that they were only special if they had kids; she felt that as long as she had this little girl, than she would be taken care of by the state as well. She was not able to take care for this little girl and I seen this myself. How sad it was when I found out that this little girl had someone like you (my aunt) to care for her, but like you say, DSHS here is wrong on so many levels. With this little girls death and many-many others out there facing the same tragic circumstances, DSHS does not care about the outcome of these children. I am so sorry for you, I Know that you loved this baby and would’ve cared for her like she was your own. Only someone like you who has been through the same can truly understand the stress and anguish this family is going through being w/out little Poca. I hope that the outcome is only hope and love for this little girl rather than another little kid lost in our system never to hear from again. Too many children our put in harms way because of our DSHS and I hope that they are finally STOPPED! I will keep praying for this little girl and for you too; I know that you must be going through allot right now with this situation at hand again and God will bless you in the end because you are blessed!

Jill said...

This is too sad for words! I am sooooo sorry!

Henya said...

This is horrible. I see this kids all the time. Kids who are neglected because the parents do not care, or most of the time just do not know better. And no one interferes, yet I was flagged as a potential child neglecter after I had my youngest only because she is a number six. A social worker wanted to know if my pregnancy was an accident!!!

Kim H. said...

This is a gutwrenching story. We must not only pray just for little Poca, but all who are in these messes of situations.

Frizzy said...

I am sick right now. Physically sick. I am soooo sorry to hear this and just writing those words sounds cliche! I have asked WHY? so many times. I have been angry and bitter when reading of stories like this or just thinking about what my daughter's life was like prior to being removed from her original home. What possible lesson could we learn from this horror? I hope DSHS was investigated and the individual who made such a huge decision was investigated and lost his/her license and job!

Frizzy said...

When I click to view your blog I get a message saying it's no longer available. Just thought you would want to know in case your comment numbers are down. I clicked on your blog title in that message and it brought me directly to you. What the heck is going on in blog land lately?

Joanna Jenkins said...

Oh. My GAWD!!!! What a tragic story. I am so sorry.
I stopped by from SITS-- I will be back again soon. Until then, my heart is with you.

Sarah said...

Lord have mercy.

Anne said...

You have my prayers. I see quite a bit of sadness myself as a nutritionist for the WIC program and have been and will be writing about it on my own blog. Feel free to check it out-http://annebender.blogspot.com/

I love the title of your blog, as the mother of 5, I find myself telling people these same words quite often. God Bless You!

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